I had a chance to see this movie today, finally striking it off my Infinite Backlog.
I knew nothing about it beforehand other than it was about a woman with a keen insight into snow.
It turns out that woman is a mixture of a white father and an Inuit mother. That combination apparently leads to this:
Which doesn’t look one bit Inuit to me — but a character in the movie glances at her and asks her if she is. Yeah, I should have known that with something that dumb in the front, the back of it would be Major Dumb.
Building a Bigger Action Hero
Brando never did crunches. Al Pacino didn’t slurp protein shakes. Cary Grant had never even heard of burpees, BOSU balls, or human growth hormone. But not one of today’s leading men can afford the luxury of a gym-free life. You simply don’t get your name on a movie poster these days unless you’ve got a superhero’s physique – primed for high-def close-ups and global market appeal. Getting there takes effort, vigilance, and the dedication of the elite athlete: high-intensity training, strict diets, supplements, and hormone replacement. If that fails, there are always drugs. Today’s actors spend more time in the gym than they do rehearsing, more time with their trainers than with their directors.
And I grew up as a huge comic book fan.
Not anymore. I can’t stand the fucking movies they’re doing.
I’ll take Jimmy Stewart fighting the entire country with only his voice in Mr. Smith Goes to Washington over any goddammed actor in a latex costume with steroid-assisted bulk.
I again quote Nikki Finke, who saw it all coming back in 2008:
Pretty soon, every single fucking Hollywood film is gonna be based on a comic one way or another. Ugh.
The future is hollow. We should all kill ourselves now.
Based on a book I haven’t read and didn’t know anything about before seeing the movie. So I don’t know how much is true.
But it creeped me out. Forty-five year old Charles Dickens falling for someone when she was not yet eighteen.
Yes, I know I’m looking at it from my modern point of view and things were different back then. But still. It creeped me out.
If it was supposed to inspire tender emotions, it failed. All I saw was a man losing his mind, throwing away his sense, and forfeiting his dignity.
But many men do that, even today.
Go look. Just go look. There are no words I can add.
For years I have wondered who that silent, hot woman was behind the President in The Fifth Element:
If you haven’t seen Secondhand Lions, you should.
I stumbled on it late last year and it’s one of my favorite movies. I’ve seen it maybe four times.
After the break is a clip.