On “Caring”

Philip Seymour Hoffman and Hollywood’s drug addiction: Why did nobody care about the actor’s problem until it killed him?

Headlines are often written by an editor, so I will cut the writer of that column some slack.

But the sentiment behind that headline — Why did nobody care about the actor’s problem until it killed him? — really gets up my nose today.

For some people — perhaps most people — “caring” is a waste of energy, thought, and emotion.

Three episodes where I “cared” in the past two months reinforced this point to me.

1) Someone on Twitter made some remarks that were disturbing, then deleted the entire account. Concerned, I tracked down this person’s email and inquired. It was a waste. The Twitter account was restored and — without me being mentioned by name, but it was clear I was meant — I got an eyeful about “respecting boundaries” and other such far-Left Marxist bullshit, the kind of worthless militant cant that’s often flung around to replace actual human emotions. So much for being concerned. So much for being “caring.”

2) Last week a neighbor — likely in a drunken stupor because the person’s a drunk — tripped and banged up a knee at 3AM. The person phoned for help. Would the person call 911 for emergency assistance? No. Despite the injury being possibly life-threatening on many levels at that person’s age and condition, that person refused to go to the E.R.. Someone else summoned 911 two days later — because that person was still immobile and sitting in shit and piss — and the responders were sent away. Two people “cared” and what did it gain?

3) A few days ago, I was around someone who suddenly presented dangerous stroke-like symptoms. I wanted to call 911. I was told not to. A few days later, while at work, that person developed more serious stroke-like symptoms and finally went to the E.R.. Had that person gone the first time, that person might have been spared the second episode and the worse side-effects that have entailed. What did my “caring” do for that person?

Listen, when people are adults, they are free to make up their own damn minds whether or not you agree with their choices.

And there is not one fucking thing you can do about that without breaking the law.

What, you should restrain them and physically take them for help?

I don’t know where the hell you live, but where I live there are several laws against all of that.

And you know what? Those laws make sense.

You don’t get to decry a parent who has her son forcibly taken to a “gay de-programming clinic” and then on the other hand wail that “someone” should have forced Philip Seymour Hoffman — or Heath Ledger — or the countless others who have ODed themselves to death — into some kind of treatment.

It doesn’t work that way.

I am really disgusted with people who talk about “caring.”

Especially since none of them would have acted any differently.

Trust me — if they had acted differently, you’d have seen headlines about a kidnapping of Seymour or Ledger or whoever.

Not everybody can be saved. Face that harsh fact of life.

At one time, this entire nation moved to “care.” It was called Prohibition. Think about that while you sit there on your goddammed Laz-E-Boy with your new blue aluminum-bottled resealable Bud Light.

So don’t ever tell me I don’t “care.” You can fuck off trying to distribute an unearned guilt onto me.

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